
#78
Title:
My Pet Virus: The True Story of a Rebel without a Cure
Author: Shawn Decker
Publisher: Jeremy P. Tarcher/Penguin
Year: 2006
Genre: Autobiography, HIV/AIDS
240 pages
Maybe
I'm just turning into a horrible old woman, but I want to shake my fist
at Mr. Decker and shriek, "Take care of yourself! People love you--stop
your binge drinking before you kick up your hepatitis B and C!"
Because, you see, Decker is a hemophiliac ("thinblood" in his parlance)
who acquired HIV, HBV, and HCV through clotting factor. On the one hand,
I have no problem with the idea that the goal isn't to live as long as
possible; on the other, I find myself angry when people deliberately
harm themselves in life-threatening ways, whether they have HIV or not.
Thus, I am not entertained when Decker recounts instances where he puts
himself at grossly unnecessary risk. Instead of feeling affection for
him, I want to keep myself distant from him. Maybe if I knew him I'd
have a better sense of what he's actually like, and what it's like to
interact with him. The lack of interaction contributes to my dislike of
this persona.
It doesn't help that I don't share his sense of
humor, so this humorous autobiography doesn't seem funny to me. I tell
myself that the guy is in his early 30s and supports himself with
edu-schtick about HIV. I tell myself that he has the right to influence
his destiny to the extent that he can. I tell myself that there is other
humor out here related to HIV and hepatitis that I
do find
funny. It's possible that I've just had too many friends and family
members die of HIV and HCV to enjoy Decker's self-congratulatory
descriptions of his youthful danger-seeking.
The narrative jumps
around a bit and is somewhat confusing to follow as well as repetitive.
This is an editor's job, not the author's, but doesn't help with my
lack of empathy.
So see for yourself whether I'm just a horrible buzz-killing shrew and Decker is da bomb; his website is
www.mypetvirus.com and his blog is
http://blogs.poz.com/shawn/. Let me know.
Thanks for Reading (Comment from the Author)
Hello, it's Shawn the author here.
Sorry
the humor missed the spot with you, in writing the book I tried to
tackle certain areas of my life with the honesty in which I lived them
at the time. From my bumbling forays into mixing my sexual awakening
with my HIV diagnosis, to my bumbling late teens when an HCV diagnosis
hit around the same time I started drinking socially.
I'm not
really a huge risk taker at all, and of course I now look back at my
early 20's and understand why my parents were worried when I got
"sloshed" and then post the results on the internet. In writing those
stories, I knew they were stupid but wanted the reader to deduce that on
their own level, without me pointing down in judgment of myself.
The
tone of the book is also shaped by the fact that I started writing the
book at 25. I'm 32 now, and am sure that I'm going to rewrite My Pet
Virus somewhere down the line, might be a nice 40th birthday present.
My lack of sloshing these days will increase my already excellent odds
of getting there.
I've lost a lot of friends to HIV/AIDS as well,
and I do my best to honor their spirit. Again, my apologies if the
humor offended, but it's been my greatest ally in enjoying this strange
trip we call life.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Reply
Hi Shawn,
Thanks for your reply. I hope that my review adequately
conveys my impression that my responses probably derive from my own
history, relationships, and sense of humor, and that people should go
directly to your work to form their own opinions rather than relying on
me. I admire you for telling your story; though it doesn't connect for
me as well as some of your POZ columns have, I was happy to read it and
will read your future work. If it's okay with you, I'd like to post your
reply in the main entry for the book so it's immediately visible to
anyone reading this LJ. Would that work for you? Thanks.